Taylor Swift is Single... I Know You Care a Lot.

Another fake celebrity relationship has gone kaput. Taylor Swift was dumped by Joe Jonas of the Jonas Brothers over the cellphone this past month. Taylor told OK! it was because of Camilla Belle, some half Brazilian hot chick who was in one of Joe's terrible music videos... seriously, it's so bad I'm not posting it. Taylor said, "They’ve been together since we broke up. That’s why we broke up - because he met her." She sounds devastated. I bet Taylor went straight into severe depression when she heard that her publicist dumped Joe for her. With her awful new country CD skyrocketing to #1 and all, it's been tough for her lately. She's probably been staying up all night balling her eyes out, listening to sad emo songs on repeat, chain smoking, and only eating chocolate and ice cream. But I'm 99.9% sure she's not. That's why I hate her. And because she has slits for eyes:

Oh, Camilla Belle is 22 years old and way hotter. And she has human shaped eyes. Here's Camilla:

I wish I had an publicist that guaranteed me one hot girlfriend at all times (Jona?? Future career option?). Actually any girlfriend. Could be ugly as hell. I'm desperate. I'd even take taylor swift. Taylor, call me. No, blog me.